Monthly Archives: January 2013

Taking Inventory

Posted by lifecorked in Faith, Sobriety and tagged with , , , , , , ,

No pictures, no quotes, no DIY, no recipes. Today, was one of those days I needed to write. I started this blog so I could have an outlet to share my experience; my story; my sober life. It’s my therapy; my free form of therapy if you will (I’ve had plenty of the kind you pay for too). Sometimes I just need to vent. You may or may not relate to everything I talk about, but my hope is we will all relate on the human level. The level of just living life.

The last few days I’ve been feeling icky. Not icky in the sense of being sick, but icky in the sense of feeling anxious, agitated and stressed. I’m quick to snap and the smallest thing can push me over the edge. Usually, I notice my OCD acting up and I immediately know something is “off.” For a recovering alcoholic this is not a good place to be because it lowers our defenses against that first drink. And, for us, there’s never “just one drink.” It’s a scary place to be, which is why when I start feeling this way I know it’s time to take inventory.

It’s kind of like when you lose your keys and you have to stop everything you’re doing and go back in your mind to where you last saw them. In a similar way, I have to stop and go back to what happened to make me feel this way. Once I started thinking about it, I realized it started on Monday. For some reason the kids were at each other all day on Monday. I felt like I was constantly playing referee. Monday night my husband had to work late, which meant I couldn’t make my favorite recovery meeting and he wouldn’t be home to put the kids down – something he does every night. On Tuesday morning, he had to leave before the kids got up, which meant the kids didn’t see him that morning either. By this time, our routine was completely off. For better or worse, we are very routine oriented people and anything that deviates from that routine tends to put us all on edge, especially me. So, there you go, I figured it out.

Now, what could I have done differently to change my reaction to the situation? I could’ve prepared better by talking to the kids about the fact that it was a busy time for Daddy and he would be gone more than normal; I could’ve asked my in-laws to watch the kids while I went to my meeting (because I really needed one); I could’ve called my sponsor when I first started feeling stressed (because that’s what you do); I could’ve read out of my recovery books; I could’ve said some extra prayers or opened my Bible. I could’ve and should’ve. The important point I’m trying to make is that, through recovery, I have learned how to STOP and take inventory. How am I feeling and how did I get here?

I tend to think it’s a great tool for everyone, regardless if you’re in a recovery program or not. How many times have we kept tumbling out of control, never stopping to ask ourselves “what is going on?” Taking inventory of your feelings doesn’t mean blaming someone else for the way you feel, it simply means reviewing how you got to where you are and, hopefully, learning ways to prevent it from happening next time.

Yes, I am a planner and I like routine, but as I always remind myself – life is not perfect. Things come up. Heck, life comes up! As long as I am prepared with the tools I need to approach the unexpected and spiritually fit, I can tackle what life throws my way. I truly believe God will not give me anything I can’t handle, including two strong-willed kids!

Thanks for letting me vent!

 

Valentine’s Marshmallow Pops

Posted by lifecorked in Sobriety and tagged with , , , , , , , , , , ,

MP Closeup

I’m so excited to share this sweet treat with you! I first made these marshmallow pops as favors for my daughter’s birthday party last year and they were a huge hit. Since then, I’ve been known to make them on a whim as a simple sweet treat – like today! Not only are they yummy (if you like marshmallows) but also super cute! You can make these for any occasion or holiday, however, with Valentine’s Day just around the corner I thought they would be a perfect pre-Valentine’s Day treat!

Here’s what you’ll need:

Jumbo marshmallows (Safeway is the only store near me that carries them throughout the year)

Candy chocolate (I usually get mine at Michaels)

Cake pop sticks

Sprinkles/candy (whatever you want to dip them in)

Directions:

1. Take the marshmallows and slice a small hole at one end. This will make it easier when inserting the stick.

MP Knife

2. Insert sticks. Set on plate or cookie sheet and refrigerate for 30 minutes or until firm. This will help the marshmallows adhere to the sticks.

MP Sticks

3. Set up your marshmallow “station.” I put chocolate first, then sprinkles and end with a plate or cookie sheet covered with wax paper.

MP Setup

4. Heat chocolate in microwaveable safe bowl by following directions on candy package.

MP Chocolate

5. Now is the fun part! Dip marshmallows in chocolate, gently roll in sprinkles and place on wax paper. Let sit for at least an hour before packaging or serving. On a side note, I had some extra chocolate leftover and there was no way I was going to let it go to waste! I just happened to have strawberries and pretzels on hand, so a few extra treats were added to the mix! I think my husband will be happy!

MP Finish

Enjoy!

Tip Junkie

The Shabby Nest

Give Me Ears to Listen

Posted by lifecorked in Faith and tagged with , , , , , , ,

Give Me Ears to Listen

Sometimes you hear the perfect song at just the right time. Like, when you’re driving in your car and a song comes on the radio and you immediately turn it up because it’s THE song. You could swear that you wrote the lyrics because it expresses what you’re going through – then and there.

I love it when this happens and I love it even more when it happens at church. Today, as I sat in church with my husband, I just wasn’t feeling it. Maybe I was preoccupied with other thoughts or the strong scent of after shave coming from the old man next to me. We were seated in a different section and it bothered me. I’m a creature of habit (for better or worse) and little things like that make my head spin. I know, trivial, but it’s true (and I’m working on it). Anyway, as we stood to sing, I was overcome with a sense of peace as I sang along to the song. It was one of my favorites and I hadn’t heard it for a long time. As I continued to sing, everything else faded away and I was right there, in the moment.

Give Me Ears to Listen

by Timothy R. Smith

Let me be your servant; let me walk your way.
Guide me on your path; give night the light of day.
Let me be a sure foundation, pure and strong.
Let me tell of your salvation all life long.

Refrain
Give me ears to listen. Give me eyes to see.
Give me words to speak and show your face to me.

In silence, when you call me, let me hear your voice.
Jesus, walk beside me; let my soul rejoice.
When winds and currents batter me, help me be sure.
Give me courage from the storms when they occur.

Last night, when I awoke I heard you call my name.
You refreshed my soul; I felt your burning flame.
Oh, strengthen me to bear my cross and walk your way.
Give me grace to comfort those with all I say.

Please, God, always give me ears to listen – especially when I’m distracted with trivial things. Thank you.

Banana Cake with Vanilla Frosting

Posted by lifecorked in Sobriety and tagged with , , , , , , , , , , ,

BC Closeup

Okay, I’m warning you, this cake is addictive! If you like banana bread, you will LOVE this. My inspiration for this cake came from Pinterest, however, I added my own little twist on it and I think it turned out great. Not only is it yummy, but it’s semi-healthy. Well, as healthy as cake can be for you, but whatever! It past the taste test with both my husband and daughter, so I’ll take that as a good sign! Oh, and it’s SUPER easy, which makes it even better!

The original recipe didn’t call for walnuts or ground flax, but in an effort to make it a bit healthier, I decided to add them and was thrilled with the results. I also substituted light sour cream for regular sour cream. Luckily, I had all the ingredients on hand so that made it easy to modify. The original recipe called for homemade vanilla frosting, however, I happened to have a jar of Betty Crocker vanilla frosting on hand so I decided to use that instead. I know, store bought frosting? Gasp! Hey, I say whatever works for you, do it! To top it off, I sprinkled a dash of cinnamon on each piece of cake before I served it. It looks pretty and adds a fun flavor!

Okay, here’s what you’ll need:

2/3 cup sugar

1/2 cup light sour cream

1 egg

2 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened

2 mashed super ripe bananas

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 cup flour

1/4 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1/4 cup chopped walnuts

2 tablespoons ground flax

Directions (easily mixed by hand):

Preheat oven to 350F if using glass or 375F if using a non-stick or coated pan. Cream together sugar, sour cream, egg and 2 tablespoons softened butter. Add mashed bananas and 1 teaspoon vanilla extract.  Add flour, salt, baking soda and ground flax; mix well. Add walnuts; mix. Pour into greased 8×8 pan. Bake for 20-25 minutes until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.  Cool completely before frosting.

If you’re like me you can grab that jar of frosting sitting on the shelf, or you can make an easy buttercream or cream cheese frosting. Either would be great!

Enjoy!

I Found God

Posted by lifecorked in Faith, Sobriety and tagged with , , , , , , , , ,

Faith

I know, it sounds so cliché to say “I got sober and found God,” but it’s true for me. I’m not saying I didn’t believe in God before I got sober; I simply had a very distant view of Him. To me, God was this ever powerful guy who was looming down from above, waiting to point His finger at me every time I did something wrong. I didn’t trust Him and I sure didn’t believe He had a plan for me. Truthfully, I was scared of Him and scared of the idea that something greater than myself was running my life. When you’re a “type a” control freak the last thing you want to think is that someone else is making the decisions.

I played the part well. I went to church with my husband, said the Our Father, kneeled, stood (and kneeled again), got my blessing and said a prayer here and there – usually when I really needed something. But, that’s as far as I got. In fact, I used to roll my eyes at ”those” people who would go on and on about their love for Christ and all the great things He had provided for them. In my mind I would think, “sure, that’s great for you, but that just doesn’t apply to me.” The truth is, I didn’t get it. Wasn’t our life and the decisions we made up to us? And, if something unplanned did happen to us, wasn’t it up to us to make it better?

Control. That’s how I lived my life. I wanted to control everything around me, including the people closest to me. Manipulation, dishonesty, guilt – I had a lot of tricks up my sleeve. But, you know what? In the end, none of it worked. Not until I hit my bottom and realized once and for all I couldn’t control my life. In fact, I couldn’t control anything or anyone.

I’m envious of those who have always had an innate faith in God. I consider my husband one of those people who has never doubted or swayed in his belief and faith in God. For some of us, like myself, we only come to have that faith through trials and tribulations. I have never experienced something so freeing as when I finally surrendered the control that had held me prisoner for so long and gave it over to God. And, the thing is, life is so much easier now!

When I am worried, stressed or fearful, I give it over to God, knowing that He will take care of it. And, I trust, that no matter the outcome it is all part of His plan. In this crazy world, I cannot tell you how much peace and comfort it gives me to know that I have a God who cares about me and loves me just the way I am.

Fabric Bulletin Board

Posted by lifecorked in Sobriety and tagged with , , , ,

Board Closeup

I’ve had this bulletin board for quite a while now and FINALLY got it hung yesterday! I’m loving the bright cheerfulness it adds to the typical darkness of our basement office – no windows means lots of color!  Believe it or not, this bulletin board was in sad shape when I first got my hands on it. I wish I had a before photo, but I don’t so you’ll just have to imagine a sad, plain brown bulletin board. My mother-in-law found it at a rummage sale she helps put on every year and knew I was in the market for bulletin boards so she quickly confiscated it!

My first step was giving the icky wood border a fresh coat of paint. The easiest way to do this is by laying down a tarp or old sheet in the front yard (if it’s sunny) or in the garage and holding down each corner with something heavy so it doesn’t flip-up if a gust of wind catches it (I’m speaking from experience!). Put your board in the middle and spray paint the wood border. Don’t worry about spraying the cork because this will be covered with fabric anyway. You’ll want to let the paint dry overnight before the next step. I used a black gloss indoor/outdoor spray paint, but any color would work.

Paint

Once the board is dry, take your choice of fabric and lay it over the cork portion of the board and cut around the inside of the border. I use the inside of the border as a guide for my scissors so I get a fairly even cut. Next, tape off the wood border with blue painters tape and spray the cork portion of the board with adhesive spray. Remove the tape and take your fabric and carefully apply it to the adhesive sprayed cork. This is the most challenging part because your fabric will want to gap in certain areas, but just continue to lift and smooth until the entire cork is covered.

Next, take your ribbon of choice, measure each side of the border and cut. You will have four pieces of ribbon. Run a thin strip of craft glue along the inside of the wood border and attach ribbon, smoothing as you go.

Glue

Let the entire board dry overnight and you’re done! I love these boards because they’re so versatile. I have one hanging in my office, closet and two matching boards that I use at Christmas to hang cards from. They also make great gifts! My step-mom uses one in her closet to hang her necklaces from - the possibilities are endless!

Enjoy!

Simple Valentine’s Pillow

Posted by lifecorked in Sobriety and tagged with , , , , , , , , ,

Love Pillow

I know, didn’t we just celebrate Christmas?! Yes, we did, but like all holidays there’s always another one around the corner! Honestly, I’ve never been a huge fan of Valentine’s Day. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a loving person and I enjoy romantic gestures, but it’s always seemed way too commercialized for just one day. I kinda feel like it’s just another way for big box stores to make money off of us. Okay, so enough of the negativity! This year I’ve decided to embrace the positive side of Valentine’s Day and show the love! If nothing else, I’m doing it for my kids because they LOVE any and all holidays!

I’ve been wanting to make a small pillow with some burlap I had leftover from another project and thought this would be the perfect opportunity. Add some red felt I also had leftover and “wahla!” (or however you spell that) a Valentine’s Day pillow! This is a super simple project, especially for the novice sewer and crafter.

Here’s what you’ll need:

1/2 yard of burlap

1 12×12 square of red felt, or a similar size

Poly-Fil pillow stuffing

1 package of Heat n Bond

Iron

Ironing board

Letter stencils, if desired

Directions:

1. Cut two 14×14 squares of burlap. I used a tape measure and fabric pen to mark measurements.

Measure

2. Follow directions on Heat n Bond and apply to felt with iron.

Heat Bond

3. To achieve symmetrical letters, trace letters on paper portion of Heat n Bond with stencil or by hand and cut out. For a more whimsical look (like mine), cut out letters by free hand.

Iron Letters

4. Once your letters are cut out, follow directions on Heat n Bond to apply them to one square of your burlap. You will need to remove paper backing from letters, pin them in place, turn burlap and letters facing down on ironing board and iron as directed. Once letters are ironed on, place both squares of burlap together, with letters facing inward and sew 1 1/2 inches in along the top and both sides of pillow.

Sew

5. Trim excess burlap off around seams, leaving about a 1/2 inch. This reduces the bulk once the pillow is turned inside out. Turn pillow inside out, making sure corners are pushed all the way out. Stuff pillow with Poly-Fil until desired fullness is achieved. Fold seams inward on bottom of pillow and pin to hold in place. Once you have pinned along the entire bottom, you will need to hand stitch closed.

Pin Seam

I’m using my pillow as a cute little accent pillow in our living room. You could also give as a gift to show someone your love on Valentine’s Day and all through the year!

Enjoy!

Making Things Happen

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Henry David Thoreau

I did it! I FINALLY registered for my first mud run! What the heck is a “mud run” you might ask? Well, it’s usually a 5k run and obstacle course that takes place in the mud. Yes, that’s correct, in the mud. They’ve gained in popularity over the past few years and I’ve been wanting to do one ever since I first heard about them.

Let’s get this straight. I’m not a runner. I gave up running years ago when I developed bursitis in my knee (getting old sucks!). However, I do excercise on a regular basis, which mainly includes the elliptical and light weights. I figure I can survive the moderate running portion, but I’ll LOVE the muddy obstacle course. I mean, really, how often do grown women have an excuse to roll around in the mud by choice!?

If you ask my husband, I’ve been talking (key word) about doing a mud run for over a year now. I would research them, figure out which one would be best for me…and then do nothing.

When I was drinking, I had A LOT of great ideas. Oh, and let me tell you, they were great alright. I was that typical person who would talk and talk about ALL the things I was going to do, yet never actually take the step to do them. That little voice inside my head would somehow talk me out of it and I would find myself back at the beginning, talking but never doing.

When I got sober I realized fear had kept me from taking that first step from talking to actually doing. Fear had been that little voice inside my head saying “you can’t do that,” “you’re not good enough,” “what would people think?” Fear had held me back from truly living my life.

With this new year of resolutions and goals, I decided fear was no longer going to rule my life. So, when my friend told me about the mud run, I said “yes!” Before thinking, talking or debating it, I went online and registered. There. It’s done. I’m doing it.

Don’t let fear rule your life. Stop talking and start doing. Yes, it’s that easy.

Crockin’ BBQ Pulled Pork

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Pulled Pork

When it’s drizzly and cold outside, nothing sounds better than something yummy cooking in the crock-pot! Don’t you think?! One of my favorite dishes to make in the crock-pot is bbq pulled pork – and it smells SO good when it’s cooking! It’s also great for leftovers and freezing for additional meals. All in all, it’s pretty much the perfect dish!

Here’s what you’ll need:

2 lb boneless pork loin roast
5 whole peeled garlic cloves
1 sweet onion, chopped
1 red bell pepper, sliced
1 cup water
1 large bottle honey bbq sauce (I will often use half honey and half of something spicier, like Stubb’s, for an extra kick)
1 package hoagie rolls or hamburger buns

Directions:
Add 1 cup of water to bottom of crock-pot. Add pork roast, bbq sauce and garlic cloves. Cover and cook on high for 4 hours. Add onion and bell pepper. Continue to keep covered and cook on low for 6 hours. An hour before it’s finished uncover and take a large fork and shred pork. Cover and finish cooking. Serve on rolls or buns.

Enjoy!