Tag Archives: love

Finding New Ways to Celebrate

Posted by lifecorked in Faith, Family, Sobriety and tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Mom

Today is my mom’s birthday. If she were still alive, she would be 64. She died almost seven years ago from pancreatic cancer and not a day goes by that I don’t think of her and wonder how my life would be different if she was still here.

In the past, I used her birthday as an excuse to drink. Since she wasn’t around to celebrate, I figured I’d celebrate for both of us, which meant drinking more than I would normally drink. Now, I realize that I drank because I missed her and I wanted (or needed) to numb the sadness I felt in not having her with me. Instead of focusing on the beautiful life she led before leaving us, I focused on the grief of not having her with us.

Today, was the first time I have woken up on her birthday feeling peaceful and joyful. I still miss her horribly; more than I could ever convey through words. The pain runs deep and I know there will always be a piece of me missing. However, today I choose to focus on her beautiful life and celebrate it without drinking. I will be completely and totally present and focus on those things which she loved.

As I look out the window, I see the tulips beginning to show themselves and the daffodils beginning to bloom. Besides her family and animals, her greatest love was being in her garden. She loved this time of year; a new beginning as new life slowly appeared after a long, grey winter.

Earlier this morning, I sat down at my sewing machine and worked on my son’s new valances as I sipped my coffee and listened to one of her old records. She was an amazing seamstress; I only realize now just how good she was. My stitches are uneven and often messy. Her work was neat and precise, something that only comes with time and practice. I picture her smiling (and perhaps laughing) at my attempts, knowing in time I will figure it out.

This afternoon, I will take my son and daughter to frozen yogurt to celebrate Grammy Rickie’s birthday. It is important for me that they know that just because someone is gone, doesn’t mean we stop celebrating their life. In talking about her and celebrating her, I hope I can always honor her life and memory.

She wasn’t perfect. She had her demons as we all do. Her life was challenging at times; sometimes more than she thought she could handle. But, she did and she did it with grace, dignity and bravery.

Although, I lost her way too soon, I am so grateful I had her for the time I did. Would I change things if I could? Perhaps. But, I know that God needed her more than I did. Her strength and bravery continue to guide me on this journey through life.

And, when the time comes, and I see her again I will laugh with her about my messy and uneven seams.

Happy birthday, Mom!

Real Love

Posted by lifecorked in Faith, Family and tagged with , , , , , ,

Love Story

My husband and I don’t do a lot these days for Valentine’s Day. We have two kids six and under and life is hectic. We honor the day with a card and a small token of our appreciation for each other. It’s not like the old days when he would whisk me away for surprise overnight trips to the beach or fancy dinners, but that’s okay. You see, waking up next to him every morning is good enough, in fact, it’s perfect.

In the early days, there was the anticipation and excitement, and more than that, there was the unknown. Perhaps, part of the excitement was the unknown. Today, when I look at my husband I see our history. I see the joy and happiness we have experienced and I see the dark times we have endured. At times, I have not been easy to love. In fact, I have been impossible. But, he never left and he never stopped looking for a reason to love me.

When I look at my husband today, I see love – our imperfect love. Our real love.

And, I thank God for putting him in my life because I cannot imagine loving anyone else the way I love him.

Happy Valentine’s Day. May you experience real love today and always.

Simple Valentine’s Pillow

Posted by lifecorked in Sobriety and tagged with , , , , , , , , ,

Love Pillow

I know, didn’t we just celebrate Christmas?! Yes, we did, but like all holidays there’s always another one around the corner! Honestly, I’ve never been a huge fan of Valentine’s Day. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a loving person and I enjoy romantic gestures, but it’s always seemed way too commercialized for just one day. I kinda feel like it’s just another way for big box stores to make money off of us. Okay, so enough of the negativity! This year I’ve decided to embrace the positive side of Valentine’s Day and show the love! If nothing else, I’m doing it for my kids because they LOVE any and all holidays!

I’ve been wanting to make a small pillow with some burlap I had leftover from another project and thought this would be the perfect opportunity. Add some red felt I also had leftover and “wahla!” (or however you spell that) a Valentine’s Day pillow! This is a super simple project, especially for the novice sewer and crafter.

Here’s what you’ll need:

1/2 yard of burlap

1 12×12 square of red felt, or a similar size

Poly-Fil pillow stuffing

1 package of Heat n Bond

Iron

Ironing board

Letter stencils, if desired

Directions:

1. Cut two 14×14 squares of burlap. I used a tape measure and fabric pen to mark measurements.

Measure

2. Follow directions on Heat n Bond and apply to felt with iron.

Heat Bond

3. To achieve symmetrical letters, trace letters on paper portion of Heat n Bond with stencil or by hand and cut out. For a more whimsical look (like mine), cut out letters by free hand.

Iron Letters

4. Once your letters are cut out, follow directions on Heat n Bond to apply them to one square of your burlap. You will need to remove paper backing from letters, pin them in place, turn burlap and letters facing down on ironing board and iron as directed. Once letters are ironed on, place both squares of burlap together, with letters facing inward and sew 1 1/2 inches in along the top and both sides of pillow.

Sew

5. Trim excess burlap off around seams, leaving about a 1/2 inch. This reduces the bulk once the pillow is turned inside out. Turn pillow inside out, making sure corners are pushed all the way out. Stuff pillow with Poly-Fil until desired fullness is achieved. Fold seams inward on bottom of pillow and pin to hold in place. Once you have pinned along the entire bottom, you will need to hand stitch closed.

Pin Seam

I’m using my pillow as a cute little accent pillow in our living room. You could also give as a gift to show someone your love on Valentine’s Day and all through the year!

Enjoy!